The Benefits of Mourning Your Sorrow

by | Feb 6, 2018 | Grief, Healing | 12 comments

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4 NIV).

Years ago, the sudden and unexpected death of the father of a young family rocked our family. I couldn’t help but observe the grief etched into the faces of the deceased man’s father and son as they bravely marched, hand in hand, down the funeral aisle.

His wife, on the other hand, modeled strength and composure as she greeted each visitor. She presided over the afternoon with apparent ease.

A few years later, she approached me after I’d spoken on depression. She explained how a year after her husband’s death she’d emotionally crashed. But she’d finally given herself permission to grieve and was on the road to wholeness.

We grieve in various ways. But denying our sorrow or burying it under responsibility distances us from God’s comfort. Jesus’ words on mourning in Matthew 5:4 provide important wisdom for those who grieve.

Embrace Your Loss

  1. Those who mourn will be comforted:
    Comfort comes to those who mourn. No mourning, no comfort. Acknowledging our pain allows us to receive solace from the Lord and His people. Insulating ourselves from grief isolates us and extends our suffering instead of shortening it.
  2. Those who mourn are blessed: 
    Jesus said those who mourn are blessed. Besides receiving comfort, we know wisdom is found in the house of mourning (Eccles. 7:2-4). And the fellowship of His suffering can only be experienced in our own pain (Phil. 3:10).

Weep with Those Who Weep

So how do we support those experiencing great loss? In Romans 12:15 the Apostle Paul said to “Weep with those who weep.” That tells us not to minimize someone’s loss or rush them through their sorrow. Instead, we grieve with them.

Someone said, “A grief shared is halved.” That has certainly been true for me. But I’ve also found that when I enter someone’s pain with them, even if it’s only for a moment, I too am blessed.

“Blessed are those who mourn” certainly applies to those who grieve their own losses. But could it also apply to those who mourn with others in their losses?

“Blessed are those who mourn” certainly applies to those who grieve their own losses. But could it also apply to those who mourn with others in their losses? #ChristianDevotion, #grief Share on X

This poem by Robert Browning Hamilton expresses one of the blessings that comes to those who mourn.

Along the Road

I walked a mile with Pleasure;
She chatted all the way;
But left me none the wiser
For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow;
And ne’er a word said she;
But, oh! The things I learned from her,
When Sorrow walked with me.”
― Robert Browning Hamilton

Sorrow is not an enemy to be shunned. Instead of running from grief we do better to lean in and walk through holding God’s hand. We will be wiser and more compassionate because of the experience. And we’ll know Jesus better.

Question: What benefit do you think comes from feeling or expressing sorrow? Or what do we miss if we avoid our grief?



Blog: Grief Shared Is Halved

Booklet: Experiencing Grief

Sometimes I link up with these great sites:

#Recharge Wednesday, #Coffee for Your Heart, #TuneinThursaday, #Dance with Jesus, #Grace and Truth,

Photo by ORNELLA BINNI on Unsplash

We participate in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to and affiliated sites.

More From This Category

Jesus Removed the Sting of Death

Jesus Removed the Sting of Death

Screams from the car’s backseat jolted author Frank Peretti as he drove his family. A bee buzzed around his allergic son. Gripping the steering wheel with one hand, Peretti snatched the bee with his other. After a moment, he released it. “Daddy, Daddy, it’s still...

read more



  1. Ann Musico

    Debbie having lost my mom when I was 28 and my dad just 2-1/2 years ago as well as my grandmother and various aunts and uncles – I find it is absolutely critical to feel the emotions we feel and not try to cover or bury them. With my mom I had to be the strong one for my dad and grandmother but you really can’t escape it . I found myself grieving months later as did the wife in the story you shared. This is an important subject to share – thank you, Debbie.

    • Debbie Wilson

      Ann, we really can’t escape it. It comes back when we least expect it if we don’t walk through it. Thanks so much for sharing your experience and thoughts. I appreciate you!

  2. Melissa Henderson

    Each person is different and the way our body responds to grief is unique. I believe there is benefit in sharing grief, expressing our feelings and allowing others to share their grief. God gives us feelings and positive ways to express our emotions. I believe expressing our feelings in a positive way will help our well being and help others know they are not alone in their grief. Thank you for this informative post.

    • Debbie Wilson

      Melissa, I like how you said sharing our grief lets others know they aren’t alone in their grief. That is so true. Thank you.

  3. Leah

    Debbie, once again I am so encouraged as well as pushed to seek the face of God after reading your blog. Your message on mourning was so moving for me. Too often I have felt guilt while mourning which of course only adds to the pain. The thoughts that my mourning is taking too long or has been too emotional, or has been wasteful are just a few I will name that have plagued me from time to time.
    Praise God His word promises He comforts us like no other and is close to the broken-hearted and I have certainly felt His nearness like never before in my life . Somehow I had overlooked the verse in Ecclesiastes 7:2-4 you discussed and the wisdom that is found. Wow! This is so good. Praise God

    • Debbie Wilson

      Leah, God is good. It encourages me to hear how He comforted you with fresh Scriptures. May you find peace in God’s timing.

  4. Lisa notes

    This is such important work, Debbie. It’s easier for me to be with friends who do grieve rather than friends who try NOT to grieve when they have reason to. 🙁 God gave us emotions for a reason and while grief looks differently on each one of us, it is a vital part of the letting go process. Thanks for sharing this!

  5. Debbie Wilson

    I agree, Lisa. I think sometimes we’re embarrassed, feel weak, or fear we’ll totally lose control. But the opposite often happens. Those who honestly express their grief are brave, strong, and progress through their sorrow. Thanks for adding your thoughts.

  6. Ruth

    I like the idea that not only those who mourn their own losses are blessed, but also those who mourn with others. Thanks for this great thought! Tweeted @Willowruth7
    Your neighbor at Recharge Wednesday.

    • Debbie Wilson

      I like that thought too, Ruth. It makes it a little less scary to tiptoe in with someone who is sorrowing.

  7. Theresa Boedeker

    Wonderful wisdom. It seems when we don’t grieve at the time, it will come back later for us to deal with. Only this time it may be anger or another emotion. We think we don’t have time to grieve, but it is important work we need to do. Love the poem.

    • Debbie Wilson

      Theresa, I agree with you. It will find us. Thanks for joining the conversation.

Refreshing Faith Blog

Pin It on Pinterest