Debbie W. Wilson

Refreshing Faith

Have You Counted the Cost of Not Forgiving?

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“Fair is what comes to the state fairgrounds once a year,” a friend’s divorce attorney said. Many things in life don’t seem fair. And forgiveness is one of them.

If you forgive the person who owes you $30,000, money won’t magically appear to replace what’s lost. They spent your money, and you go without. That’s not fair.

If someone maligns your reputation, steals your business, your innocence, or your spouse, forgiving won’t restore these losses. That’s not fair. They did wrong, and you pay the price.

Some consequences can’t be retracted even if the perpetrator wants to undo what happened. So how do we satisfy our sense of justice and forgive when the wrong cost us so much?Continue Reading

Forgiving Hurts; Not Forgiving Hurts More

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I feel sooooooo free…Part of me wants to jump up and down. Another part stands in awe that nothing ties me down any more. The wounds still hurt, but they don’t own me anymore. I never thought so much pain on Thursday could lead to so much joy and peace! I’m glad I didn’t give up.”

The above email expresses the freedom forgiveness offers. It also shows the process may be painful.

To forgive means: to—

  • send away,
  • give up,
  • let go,

Using the word FREEDOM to guide us through the process of forgiving, we’ve looked at  why we forgive and the need to be real. Today we look at our first E: Emotional.Continue Reading

To Forgive: Get Real with God

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A young woman, who’d come to me for help, sat before me describing what a wonderful man her father was. Since I knew she was a victim of incest, I asked her, “If I brought in a ten-year old girl and told you that every night her father did to her what your father did to you, would you describe her daddy as a wonderful man?”

Tears spilled down her cheeks. “How else can I forgive him?”

How do we forgive the unpardonable? It is not by creating a fantasy or spinning a lie. Jesus didn’t look down on humankind and say, “I know they mean well; I think I’ll die for them.”

No, He said, “You faithless and corrupt people! How long must I be with you and put up with you?” (Luke 9:41 NLT). Then He died for us.

In our Forgiveness series we are spelling FREEDOM, because forgiveness brings freedom. Last week we looked at why we forgive. Now, let’s look at the R in freedom. To forgive we must be Real.Continue Reading

Why Should I Forgive?

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“Will you help me control my thinking?” The airport shuttle driver’s question surprised me. He’d obviously overheard my conversation with the woman leaving the shuttle. His landlady, who called herself a Christian, had wronged him. Hurt and anger showed in his eyes and words.

How could I help this man see that to be freed from his pain he needed to forgive the woman who’d caused it?

I’m sure people have disappointed and hurt you too. It’s part of life on planet earth. Maybe that’s why Jesus included forgiveness in the prayer He taught his disciples.Continue Reading

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