“If what we believe doesn’t reflect the truth, then what we feel doesn’t reflect reality.” ~ Dr. Neil Anderson

Many years ago a woman, I’ll call Joanna, came to me because of her struggle with anger. Her husband got the brunt of her rants. As we dug deeper, I learned her father and grandfather had abused her and passively let others take advantage of her. Her primary male role models, men who should have protected her, taught her men were not to be trusted.

I knew Joanna’s husband. He was a good man. And her description of their conflicts confirmed it. I gently pointed out that her conclusion that all men were bad couldn’t be true. Jesus is male. My male husband and son are both good men. She also had a sweet son.

Her father and grandfather had been horrible role models. But living in a rainy climate for part of our lives doesn’t mean the whole world is wet. Having a bad experience doesn’t mean life stinks. Having a rotten father and grandfather doesn’t mean all men can’t be trusted.

Joanna was not so easily convinced. Everywhere she went she spotted raunchy behaving men. She’d go out with her friends and none of them saw the male jerk across the restaurant, but she noticed. These cads reinforced her erroneous view of men.Continue Reading